How Did He Grow?

If you are a grandparent, you will understand how deep my love is for my grandchildren. The love is so fierce, so deep, so much so, that I felt like I grew another heart just to hold all the love for each one of them. From the moment my children announced that I would become a NaNa again, my love was immediate! But the moment they enter the world, the love becomes so much more.

Grandchildren are a precious gift from God! They are His reward! 

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17

My first grandchild, Kelson, was born on April 9, 1998. Yes, he is now 18 years old, and getting ready to graduate from high school this week. Thursday, May 19, 2016, my grandson, Kelson Alan McClusky, will walk across the stage. His childhood is done. He is becoming a man. Here is what I want to know. How is this possible? Where did the time go? How did he grow up so quickly?  It seems like just yesterday I was rushing to the airport, boarding a plane to Oklahoma, frantic that I would miss his birth. And I did! By 30 minutes. But he was a healthy baby boy with blonde hair and gorgeous, big blue eyes! 

For the first 2 years of Kelson's life, my daughter and her husband lived in Oklahoma, and I only got to see him a few times a year. Talk about hard! I wanted him to be accessible every day! I wanted to be able to see him whenever I wanted. Finally, shortly after his second birthday, they moved back to Ohio! It was one of the happiest days of my life. From the moment they arrived, he became pretty much, Nana's boy!

By the time Kelson started school, he had a passion for skateboarding. He quickly became very talented on his skateboard, and basically had no fear! I remember several times holding my breath as I watched him swerve around on one of his many skateboards. Jumping ramps, riding rails, you name it, he done it. It is still his passion today. 

My heart is bitter-sweet! I am so proud of the man Kelson is growing to be, but yet, I want to hold back the hands of time. I want him to still be the little guy that only NaNa could rock to sleep at night. I want him to be the little boy that begged for me to take him to the skate park, or couldn't wait to go to Walmart to get a new pack of Pokemon cards, or a new Tek Dek miniature skateboard, (which he usually ended up getting both!) But wanting him to stay little is the selfish part of this NaNa's heart! 

My grandson has the kindest heart. He is such an amazing person. I can honestly tell you that I have never heard him say a bad word about anyone. He is so loving, caring, giving, and respectful. He is so appreciative of what anyone does for him. He radiates love! He is brave! Kelson will be joining the Navy shortly after graduation this summer. 

I will miss him so very much, but I am so proud of the man he is becoming. I know he will be successful and give us all so much more to be proud of. I am so excited to watch his life grow into something amazing! I love you Kelson Alan! With All My Heart! Always, Forever, and Unconditionally! Love, NaNa

Start children off the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Proverbs 22:6 

I am linking up with Kate Motaung at Five Minute Friday, the prompt this week is: GROW

Forgive And Be Forgiven

I have not always been one to have an easy time with forgiving others. As a matter of fact, I used to be quite the opposite. I held grudges, I sometimes would try to think of ways to get even with them, and I quit talking to people who hurt me or made me mad. It was as simple as that. I am pretty sure that after being hurt, rejected, abused, and disappointed time and time again, made me a very unforgiving person.

Even after being saved I still struggled with it. I would pray about it, and still feel so much anger and bitterness towards certain people from my past. I thought I was doing something wrong, like not praying right, or maybe God just didn't hear me. I thought it should come quickly. Just. Like. That. I thought God should just magically give me peaceful feelings towards these people. What I didn't realize was that I had to truly want to forgive them in my heart. I was reading Psalms 103 one day, and it became so clear what I was doing wrong!

The grace of God could not have been more beautifully described. It came to me, that I am a sinner and I cause Him pain, yet He responds to me so entirely unlike how I was inclined to respond to those who hurt me. I felt justified in treating them badly, or holding grudges against them. They deserved it! I thought. I then realized that I too deserve God's wrath, but He gives me compassion and abundant love instead. He treats me the very opposite way of how I deserve to be treated. He forgave me of all my sins, but I was holding on to this sin of not forgiving others.

Forgiveness was not immediate. It was a process. It took a lot of strength and prayer. When I didn't have the will to want to forgive, I knew that God would give me the will through prayer. I asked God to give me eyes to see these people as He sees them, and to remind me that He made them in His image. 

I am so glad that I have learned how to forgive! I am no longer walking around plotting on how I can get back at those who have hurt me, or obsessing about what I would say to them if given a chance to give them a piece of my mind. I am so glad that I found forgiveness through Jesus Christ, the One who paid it all, so that we could be forgiven! I have heard it said that those who choose to forgive are making a choice to be filled with joy! I am making the choice to FORGIVE! 

I am linking up with Karen Beth at Finding The Grace Within/Tuesday At Ten

Pass It On

When I was young we played a game called Pass it On. It was normally played where there was a group of people, like slumber parties or on the playground. The first person in the group would whisper something in the next persons ear and say "pass it on." That person would whisper what the first person said to the next person and add something to it, and say "pass it on."  So by the time you got to the end, there was a whole story made up! You get the picture. 

Normally it was harmless, silly things being said, but I remember a time when playing "Pass it On" at a slumber party resulted in a couple of people who actually got hurt over it. Here is what happened. When playing this game, it got to the point of what we as adults would consider "gossip." By the time we returned to school on Monday the victims of the "pass it on" game were being talked about and made fun of at school, and the things being said were not true. They were not at the party to defend themselves when it began, so they had no way of knowing what would transpire out of a drama filled game that took place over the weekend. As the week progressed, people kept "passing it on," adding to the rumors and drama, and it got really ugly. I recall the sorrow in my own heart for taking place in the initial game, and vowed to never play that game again. I felt so bad for these people, they were my friends and I took place in starting these rumors about them, by hanging out with people who loved to start drama for others. 

I ended up confessing to my friends, and told them what happened and how the whole thing got so blown out of proportion. Of course some of the girls who were involved in the initial "Pass it On" game became very upset with me, but I was okay with that. I felt so much better by telling the truth. I realized who my real friends were, and that I was not being a real friend to them by keeping secrets and allowing people to continue to hurt them. 

Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. Ephesians 4:25

I never did play "Pass it On again! 

Even today as adults, I think rumors and drama can get so far out of hand, and it can happen before you know what hit you. I still know people that I am very close to who love to carry the drama wherever they go, and will gossip about anything, to anyone who will listen. They love to create their own storms, then get mad when it rains. I have learned to pray beforehand when I know that I am going to be seeing these people. I have also learned that it is so easy to remove myself from conversations that I feel are heading that way. I can either try to change the subject, be honest and upfront by telling them that I do not care to partake in these kinds of conversations, or simply walk away if the opportunity is there.

He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity. Proverbs 21:23

We must guard our tongues and refrain from gossip. If we surrender our desires to the Lord, He will help us to remain obedient. There are so many verses in the Bible that talk about how gossip is displeasing to God, and I do not want any part of displeasing God! Now that is something I am willing to "Pass On!" 

I am linking up with Kate Motaung at Five Minute Friday, where you write about the prompt for 5 minutes each week. This weeks prompt is: PASS!